Thank has
meaning to express to someone that you are pleased about or are grateful for
something that they have done 1. Usually people will say thank or thank you because they
want the other person to know we value what they have done for us and,
maybe, encourage them to help us again in the future. I ever read from a journal from positive
psychologists, the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology (Grant & Gino, 2010) the words ‘thank you‘ are no
longer just good manners, they are also beneficial to the self. To take the
best known examples, studies have suggested that being grateful can improve
well-being, physical health, can strengthen social relationships, produce
positive emotional states and help us cope with stressful times in our lives 2.
I personally like and agree with this statement. Unfortunately, in Indonesia especially
in my environment, I seldom to hear people who say thank or thank you. This
situation is very different if I compare with western people that I saw and
read from some western movies and book where they will say thank for several
situation.
Generally
in the United States people will say thank you in several situation, for example
when they get a gift, for a favor, for an offer of help, for a compliment and a
wish of success, when asked about their health, for an invitation, when leaving
a party or social gathering, and for services, such as being waited on in a
store or restaurant 3. But in Indonesia generally the situation where
a thank-you would be expected is when someone receives something from someone
and for a favor.
In
U.S. people will thank someone who offers to help, whether he or she accepts
their help or refuse it politely. Offering to help are usually made only once,
therefore, people do not politely to refuse the first time and thinking they
will be asked again. But in Indonesia if someone offers to help, usually she or
he just responses with saying yes or no, if she or he says no, they just say no
without thank. Thanking compliments and
wishes of success also different between Indonesia and U.S. In U.S. When
someone receives a compliment, whether on work, clothing, family, or anything
else, they appropriate to say thank you, and to make a comment about the thing
being complimented. Different with Indonesia, if someone gives compliment, for
example about your nice shirt, usually they will response with smile but
sometimes they will say thank too.
“Thank you “ is also used in reply to questions about health, or that relative in U.S. for example
if someone ask about how is your mother these days, usually they will reply the
question with explaining how is the condition of her or his mother first, after
that they will say thank. Not only for questions about health will they has say
thanked. They also say thank for the invitation, whether or not they accept it.
After someone get invitation, for example invitation for having dinner in
someone house and she or he accepts it, usually when he wants to take leave from the host he will say thank .
At this time, the host may reply by thinking the guests for coming, saying that
it was nice to have had them over. The last situation for saying thank is Americans often thank each other for other services,
for example in a restaurant, a waiter or waitress will say thank to customers
when the order is taken, and customer will say thank to the waiter for the
order is placed on the table.
The expression
of thanks in Indonesia and U.S. also different. In U.S. there are two kind of
expression that usually people say, they are formal and non formal. For example
in formal expression they say “ I’m very grateful for your invitation” and the
less formal “ thanks a million !” And
the response usually “You’re very welcome “ for formal and “ don’t worry about
it” for less formal response. While In
Indonesia usually people will say “Terima kasih” both for formal and non formal situation, for
the response they usually say “ iya, tidak apa-apa”.
Thanking is not only just a
word, it is a special word that will give people positive emotional feeling.
Although Indonesia and Western has different way and different situation to say
thank, but in general the word thanks or “ terimakasih” has the same purpose to
grateful for something that someone has done.
1 Cambridge advanced learner’s dictionary third
edition
2 Dean, J. (2010). Why ‘Thank You’ Is More Than Just
Good Manners. Psych Central. Retrieved on April 12, 2013, from http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2010/09/15/why-thank-you-is-more-than-just-good-manners/
3 Naturally
Speaking , (Bruce Tillit& Mary N Bruder, Cambridge University Press :
Cambridge, 1985 page 37 ).
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